Who knew that milk, eggs, ham, and cheese—dairy products from that nice farm in Upstate New York–are the cause of autism? Who is to blame? PETA claims that it’s The Fault in Our Cows.
Significant, but we are still unsure of all the answers. But to blame the lovely chickens and cows? They are my dinner. They are like family! Haven’t you read “Charlotte’s Web?” So don’t go around telling me that Fern was autistic, too. Just because she spent time with her pig, Wilbur, all day and the spider woman doesn’t mean she’s autistic. She liked animals. Hell, she probably went to vet school!
Jeez, I give up. Listen, PETA. The Fault is NOT in our cows. Or maybe it is. We don’t know yet. Pass the eggnog.